Saturday, February 28, 2009

Masihkah ada di sudut hati?

Jauh Di Sudut Hati - Sudirman

Pasak kasih entahkah masih ada
pahit yang disimpan sebagai kenangan
makin lama makin kurang terasa di lidah rindu
mungkin makin pudar dari hati
atau makin lama ditelan sejarah

Friday, February 27, 2009

Harp & Flute Concert

On Wednesday, I gave myself a birthday present of attending a concert at Cope Auditorium on campus. There were 6 pieces of music on offer including those by Bach and Rossini. I've never watched people play harp. The concert was indeed a treat. The harpist was Lucy Wakeford. She was accomponied by flautist Adam Walker. What fascinated me was that I can enjoy the performance aurally & visually. The venue was small, so I was able to see the musicians up close. I can see their facial expression. I can even hear the flautist sucking up air in between notes.

Now I have one item less on my 'to do' list. I was hoping to attend a philharmonic or symphonic performance. Birmingham has on offer some programmes that sound interesting. I might treat myself again.

HEPSU Farewell Lunch

The team had a farewell lunch at Brown's Lane. Dr Anna is leaving for a new job. Rowan is leaving to concentrate on her growing family.

From left to right: Penny, Anna, Sue, Mike, Gina

Rowan looked at the present that she got while Jun hold baby Keir. He was well behaved, not making much noise.
This is what I had: field mushroom with spinach and goat's cheese on a bed of cous cous. Yummy. They were very filling indeed. For drink, I had an orange J2O

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Hati Emas - M Nasir

Nao tagged me. These are the rules for the tag.

1.Put your music on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds!
4. No cheating!
5. Tag others.

Unlike Nao, I don't have an iPod. So, I used the Windows Media Player on my office's PC instead.

Kekasih Gelapku - Ungu.
Not a good start. Can’t think of a direct or semi-direct way this song would be answering the question.  

Al-Hasyr – Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid

The person with the best akhlak is Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. Aishah told that his akhlak is (comparable to?) the Qur’an. If my akhlak is like one surah from the Qur’an, I’d be very happy. In a way, I was ‘driven away’ from my homeland. I wasn’t oppressed like the muhajirin. I travelled away from Malaysia to learn. I hope Allah accepts my hijrah.

Al-Fajr - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
Hmmm… I did saw the day break today. And I feel happy to start a new day.


Kau Pergi Jua – Adam Ahmad
I know that everyone will go eventually. It would be everyone’s motto, no?

You Needed Me - Westlife
Oh, this one is so appropriate. I plan to make a separate entry for it.

An-Nasr - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid

I’ve had some successes. If I get my PhD within 3 years, I’d indeed be seen as victorious. I want to be victorious in religious matters as well.

Al-Infitar - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
This is another surah describing the Day of Judgement. Well, I do quite often think about THE end.

WHAT IS 2+2?

Camar Yang Pulang – Aishah

So, there are 4 returning seagulls, innit?


Al-Asr - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
A best friend would make you remember Allah often. He would be giving the reminders with patience and with the truth. He would not be among those who are in loss.

Gerimis di Lautan - Sudirman
How could liking a person feel like having a light rain in the ocean? Is it because of the rainbow that it creates?


Ar-Rahman - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?’  That is perhaps the most emotional verse from the Quran for me. And the whole surah describes the creation of humans and their future. So, I gues this Surah IS indeed my life story – before, here, and hereafter. May I be blessed with His Mercy.


Al-Jinn - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
NO. I don’t want to be a jinn. But I pray that I’ll be like some of the Jinns in their faith and submission to Allah.

Tiada Dusta Antara Kita – Broery Marantika & Dewi Yull
I want to die as a Muslim and Mukmin. No songs at my funeral. Having said that, I fully submit to the believe that there will be no hiding the truth from the angels once I’m six feet under.


Everytime I Look at You – Il Divo
I don’t dance at wedding. But it sounds like a good song to dance at a wedding. Maybe I can have a private dancing session to this music.

Al-Kafirun - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
My business is mine, your business is yours. Even though I like you, don’t expect me to give up my values, principles, believe, and so on. And I don’t expect you to gave up yours either. For you your religion, for me my religion.

Bersamamu – Adam Ahmad
If being-with-you is my hobby, it would be a passionate one. ‘Erti kasih, erti memberi kesayangan bagiku; erti sayang, oh ertinya bermanja-manja denganmu; erti manja itulah ertinya bercinta nan suci; erti cinta, engkau kan bersamaku, semoga kekal abadi.” You’ll always be my sayang, my baby, manja.

Al-Muzzammil – Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid

The surah talks about the ‘appointment’ as a messenger for Muhammad s.a.w. Its more like getting a great responsibility. And I think I know my calling. But, who knows? May be Allah still keep my true calling a secret from me.

Cahaya Cinta – Siti Nurhaliza

Yessssssss….. friends who put a smile on my face are indeed like the brilliant glow of love.

Seperti Dulu – Siti Nurhaliza

Quite right. Shouldn’t repeat history, right? Especially the bad ones.

Al-Alaq - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
Mmmm.. I guess, reciting this surah in the middle of the night could make me cry. Contemplating about how I was created, especially on my birthday, would perhaps make me tearful.

Aku Pencintamu – Felix
Hahaha… if somebody I barely know say ‘Aku Pencintamu’, I’d indeed laugh.

Hilang Berganti – Sudirman

I don’t regret what I’ve let go. ‘Yang patah kan tumbuh, yang hilang kan berganti’. And I do appreciate having a peace of mind from letting go.

Cinta Beralih Arah – Aishah

Well, as I said before, I pray that I die a Muslim & Mukmin. I hope I will die with my heart fully submitting to and loving Him.

An-Naziat - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid

An-Naziat refers to ‘the (angels) who tear out (the souls of the wicked) with violence’. The surah talks about yaum ul-qiyamah. Don’t know how to relate it to marriage.

Maryam – Abdul Basit
Errr… I hope they don’t think me as a gender-confused son. I hope that they’ll look at me and marvel at the miraculous process of creation. I hope to be a son who makes my parents nearer to Allah.

Demi Kasih Kita - Siti Nurhaliza

Alrightee then. Someone likes me ‘demi kasih kita’.

An-Naba - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
Indeed it would. The great news would be scary to everyone.

Verily the Day of Sorting out is a thing appointed, 
The Day that the Trumpet shall be sounded, and ye shall come forth in crowds; 
And the heavens shall be opened as if there were doors, 
And the mountains shall vanish, as if they were a mirage. 

Pretty scary, huh?

Melawan Kesepian – Siti Nurhaliza
Could be true. I’d do things so that I’d be less ‘sepi’. But as it stands now, I’m not burdened by my ‘sepi’.

Al-Kahf - Sheikh Mashary bin Rashid
No, I don’t think I’d say I’m ‘ahli gua’ to my boss. That would mean I’m not being productive.


Hati Emas – M Nasir

Lucky, Unlucky

Last week, I had a very nice time eating at Red Chilli with a friend. The ambiance of the restaurant suited my mood that day. I was, like what I've told Lord Voldermort, feeling more handsome than usual. The reason for the elation was a series of good events that happened that week. I got some data to work with, planned two papers (one journal, one conference), and life was great. 

Towards the end of dinner, which was paid by my friend, I felt a small hard object in my mouth. I thought it was something that I ate. But then, my mind rewinded flashes of screen shots when I felt piercing pains in my mouth when I was eating. My tounge worked perfectly well to fish out the offending object. As I hold it on my palm, I know what had happened. My tooth filling came off!

Not a good thing. I know there'll be rain on my parade. A whole week of fortunate sequence of events were brought to a jarring halt by a dental problem. My heart sunk. I know I had to re-do the filling. I remember the anxiety of going to the dentist (no offense Dr Ida - nothing personal). I dreaded the appointment. And I also remember paying over £45 to get it done the first time.

When I went to the dentist surgery the next day, I was prepared to spend some time on the dentist chair and to spend some money. Apparently, my dental record was stored digitally. Dr Ida looked at my record and gave me a pair of news. The bad news (I knew it already) was that she had to refill the cavity for which I have to make an appointment. The good news was that the tooth filling was still under warranty! It was 51 weeks ago that I had it done. The warranty was good for one year. So, I don't have to pay a single cent to get it re-done. Alhamdulillah.

The appointment was not until today. The temporary dressing that Ida put on the cavity had long gone. 'Temporary' for me was more like fleeting, evanescent even. I hope a 'permanent' one will be actually permanent. 

I opted for a jab, rather than goint at it raw. I can take the needle. Unfortunately, the first jab didn't do much for me. I still feel an intense pain as Ida started drilling. She jabbed me twice more. And yet the drilling work was felt, but more bearable. Luckily, there wasn't much drilling to be done. It was over rather quickly. 

As a result of having three injections, the left side of my mouth felt twice its size. The anaesthethic effect was much more intense AFTER rather than DURING the surgery. As I am writing this entry, I can't feel the back of my tounge. I hope I don't bite it. That would be unlucky.

Fun: Inside Out

The fun
Originally uploaded by pak alang

Poems, musings, abstraction of life, and the likes fill me up on the inside. While my eyes are befuddled by the bright lights of the carousel, the poetry of motion on the reflected glass captured my fancy. The reflected image was more captivating than the real object. Perhaps I wasn't much excited by the carousel flair. Perhaps I was looking for something beyond the look.

I'm aware of the need to find a balance between fun on the outside and inside. When I travel, especially, I would be more introvert than usual. I try to enrich myself by finding substance in the world around me, and inside me.

Sometimes, I indulge in idle talk - getting fun from the outside. These empty talks are perhaps necessary as a social glue among people. Without these outside fun, it may be difficult for people to connect and find an inner fun.

But, idle talk alone are not for me. My craving for a more wholesome substance is very strong. While friends-for-laugh are more than welcome, friends-for-profound-experience are even more appreciated.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

3 Hari Kekenyangan

Rasanya, dah 3 malam berturut2 makan kenyang2. Patutla badan makin lembab je. asyik ngantuk. Pagi tadi, timbang berat badan di tempat kerja. Result: bertambah 1 kg. Rasanya, dah lebih 2 tahun tak cecah 63kg. 

Agaknya, sejak ada kereta, makin kurang berjalan kaki. Kurang exercise. Raket badminton, tennis, dan ping pong dah lama tak sentuh. 

Cuaca sekarang ni makin nyaman. Minggu ni suhu dijangka mencecah 2 digit. Harap2 dalam kesibukan semasa, akan ada masa untuk riadah. Kena keluarkan peluh. Ringan-ringankan badan. 

Masa kerja di UIA, buat alasan tak de masa sebab kerja. Kat sini masa ada. Kekadang tu, malam2 tak tau nak buat apa. Boleh je joggin kat luar tu. Rasa selamat je. Tak de la macam kat certain areas di KL - especially area yg banyak building constructions. Kalau jogging sorang2, mau kena pao. Worse, kena attack by 'pencari-pencari rezeki tanpa permit'. So, moral of the story... exercise la woi! nanti bila balik Malaysia, buat alasan sibuk sebab kerja lagi. Badan tu dah makin berumur.... jaga la baik2.

Birthday Soiree

Last night, I had a soiree at home in conjunction with my Gregorian birthday. I served white rice, chicken with lemon sauce, deep fried bombay duck, sambal belacan with mango, salad platter, and seri muka. On top of those food, my guests brought kuih cara, apple strudel, pakora, and passionfruit cake. Yummy!!!! I ate till I can't have more.

Thank you to all my guests.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Professional Photographer

Yeay! I'm so happy. I'm feeling I'm even more handsome than usual. Muahahahah.

I've sold my first photograph. Not ONE photo, but a booklet. Did not make much money from it, but the joy more than make up for it. In fact, the money was a nominal value to 'officially' make me a professional - earning money through the job that, until now, was mainly a hobby.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Sehingga melimpah ruah

Keep my mouth shut. That's what I tend to do. It's like a default setting for certain situations. It is also an Islamic virtue to keep hidden someone's shortcomings, specially those that can cause the person to be shamed. But, what if hiding the shortcomings causes you great pain; and the person continues to pile up the pain on you?

If the matter of concern is on obvious and plain mungkar, then it is quite easy how to approach it. We can change it using our action, words, or the least resist it internally. But, in some cases, the pain and suffering is not all that clear to the offending persons. The interpretation of their actions is lost on them. Or they innocently thought what they're doing is good and justifiable.

When the shortcomings does not affect my quality of life, then it is not my business. Bur when push comes to shove, I will have to defend myself. I'm sorry if my interpretation of things is not the same as yours. We can agree to disagree. But stop causing me pain.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Lagu bebudak

Masa kecik2 dulu, ada belajar lagu yang berkaitan dengan permainan. Kalau permainan tu melibatkan penggiliran atau pemilihan pasukan, lagu digunakan untuk menentukan kedudukan pemain. Lagu yang paling mudah ialah "lai lai li tam plom". Ada versi yang memasukkan satu lagi 'lai' dia antara li dan tam. Suku kata dalam lagu ni tak jelas maksudnya. Entah apalah etimologi sukukata ni.

Satu lagi lagu yang kawan-kawan pernah pakai lebih pelik bunyinya daripada lai li tadi.

Aci cak dewa duku daka
cak pole pole pala
cina banana cakeduk

Entah betul tidak ejaan bagi bunyi2 ni. Sesekali dinyanyikan semula, senyum sorang2.

Kalau perkataan boleh digabung secara rawak menjadi lagu, rasanya teringin juga mencipta lagu bebudak. Tak perlu fikirkan maksud, mesej dan moral. Janji bunyinya sedap dan lawak.

Hanya ketakutan

Hanya separuh pandangan
dari sebelah mata aku merenung
takut nanti sepenuh hati

Hanya sejalur gelombang
dari kelu lidah aku bertutur
takut nanti sepenuh jiwa

Hanya selapis kulit
dari sebelah tangan aku menyentuh
takut nanti seluruh raga

Pemikiran Pelik

Sorang kawan memberitahu perbualannya dengan seorang lelaki (lets say his name is J) beragama Islam. Bila ditanya mengapa dia tak bersembahyang, J kata... lebih kurang.. buat apa nak sembahyang. Kalau masuk syurga, nanti jumpa Osama Bin Laden. Kalau masuk neraka, nanti boleh jumpa Beyonce, Jennifer Lopez, etc.

Kalau J berkata demikian di depan muka sendiri, mungkin terkedu dibuatnya. Tak tau apa respon yang paling baik. One one hand, dia percaya pada hari akhirat. On the other hand, dia tidak yakin dengan pembalasan baik& buruk di hari akhirat.

قُلْ إِنَّمَا أَنَا بَشَرٌ مِّثْلُكُمْ يُوحَىٰ إِلَيَّ أَنَّمَا إِلَـٰهُكُمْ إِلَـٰهٌ وَاحِدٌ ۖ فَمَن كَانَ يَرْجُو لِقَاءَ رَبِّهِ فَلْيَعْمَلْ عَمَلًا صَالِحًا وَلَا يُشْرِكْ بِعِبَادَةِ رَبِّهِ أَحَدًا

Katakanlah (wahai Muhammad): "Sesungguhnya aku hanyalah seorang manusia seperti kamu, diwahyukan kepadaku bahawa Tuhan kamu hanyalah Tuhan Yang Satu; Oleh itu, sesiapa yang percaya dan berharap akan pertemuan dengan Tuhannya, hendaklah ia mengerjakan amal yang soleh dan janganlah ia mempersekutukan sesiapapun dalam ibadatnya kepada Tuhannya". [Surah al-Kahfi: 110)

Kalau ayat ini diambil sebagai sandaran, satu kesimpulan kecil boleh dibuat. J mungkin percaya, tapi dia tidak berharap hendak bertemu Tuhan. Dia lebih berharap mencari nikmat-nikmat dunia di akhirat.

Moga Allah memasukkan diriku, keluargaku dan sahabat-sahabatku dalam golongan yang percaya dan berharap bertemu Allah.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Zaytoun Surprise

Last week,w ent out with friends to have dinner at Zaytoun Restaurant in Leicester.  There were 12 of us. And only us at the restaurant at that time. We didn't saw any other customers. 

The food was nice. I had lamb briyani and a combo platter consisting of kebab, chicken wings, salad, and chicken tikka on naan. The naan was very soft and delicious. Somehow, I managed to ate all the food on my plate, even though the portion was very generous. 

After the main course was finished, there was a surpirse. Apparently, my friends had arranged for a birthday dessert to be served. It was a frozen profiteroles & ice cream. Yummy! Thanks ya all. 


Gambar ihsan Puan Farah Diva


The research protocol that I sent to EMAS was scrutinised by the party who's going to authorise the research. One of the issue that they had was the human resource implications. Understandably, they don't want to put undue pressure and demand on their staff. So, I had to explicitly clarify the amount of involvement of EMAS staff in my research.

One thing that I wanted to do was analysing 999 calls where ECPs were dispatched. The data comes from the Advanced Medical Priority Dispatching System (AMPDS). Upon a discussion with the EMAS people, I had to downsize the requested amount of data from 3 months to 1 month. They thought that it would take a lot of time to get the data, as its size is huge. Fair enough. I don't have an insider knowledge of the database. I don't know the population size from which I'm sampling. Nor do I know how the database is configured. I had imagined it being fairly robust that any queries can be made using a set of clicks or command line. But, who am I to say that.

At the same time that I'm processing the research proposal authorisation, I contacted my ECP mates about the data. One guy forwarded my request to someone in EMAS. Imagine my delight when this person (lets call him Greg)emailed me a data request form. It seemed that all I have to do was fill up the form, and I can get my data soon. I know that I don't need an ethics approval to do studies on the AMPDS data because there's a similar study reported in Emergency Medicine Journal. So, I was very hopeful that I don't have to wait for the research authorisation to get through to get my hands dirty on the AMPDS data.

After 3 days since the initial contact with Greg, I got 6 month worth of AMPDS data. Yeay! That's much more than my initial request. So much better. It didn't took a long time to pull up the data. I'm relieved. And very much happy. So, data for the first phase of my research is in hand. Time to do some analysing. And I can see another journal article coming up soon. 


Sunday, February 15, 2009

A New Contract

This week I've signed a new lease contract with Lisa Sbitany. I'll be moving to an upper floor unit in July. This means I'll have brighter rooms, because I can let the blinds pulled up compared to the ground floor unit that I'm occupying now. The new unit also comes with a gas cooker, instead of an electric one. At the new unit, I'll park my car right in front of the front door. So, I don't have to walk around the block anymore. With the layout feeling slightly more spacious, the unit is a good option, with an extra £10 of rent per month. 

What's more important is the end date of the lease. Lisa had put 26th September as the end of the lease. She said it coincides with the University's term time. Fair enough. In doing so, she had effectively put a specific working target for me. Now I imagine 26 Sept as the last possible day to leave Loughborough, and go back to Malaysia for good. Working backward, this means I'm sitting for my viva in middle or early September. The thesis submission should be in July, or August at the latest. A new Gantt chart is clearly in order. Feels like the end is near. 

Be patient. Be deligent. The new contract had redefined the end.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Salam Dari Glasgow

Arrived at Glasgow around 1 am today. The stately buildings reminds me of London, especially Bayswater area. 

I'm writing this post from my host's PC. Tomorrow, I'm not sure yet as to what I'll do. I can play badminton and volleyball. Or, I can just go to town and have a look around.

This is my second time in Glasgow. The trip is with for a friendly games between Malaysians from Loughborough and Glasgow. But, being a non-jock, I think I'll pass on the games. May just take some pictures to put at this blog. Hope the pics will appear here soon.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Journal Article

Here's the abstract of the journal article that I submitted to Cognition, Technology & Work.

A Framework for Situation Awareness and Decision-Making among Emergency Care Practitioners

In order to further understand the consequences of a new work role in emergency medical services, the relationship between situation awareness (SA) and decision-making among emergency care practitioners (ECPs) was examined. A scoping study was completed and involved observations (36 hours of ride-outs and 4 hours of sit-ins) and semi-structured interviews with a group of ECPs and Triage Nurses. A subject matter expert was consulted to validate a communication map derived from the observations and interviews. The results demonstrate that a range of system factors could affect the creation of SA and decision-making. Based upon these results, a framework for SA and decision-making among ECPs was developed. This study extends the study of SA into emergency medical services domain and contributes toward a better understanding of a new practitioner role in the UK. Factors related to the development of SA should be understood to support decision-making among ECPs and thereby improve the quality of care in emergency medicine.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Belanja Kenduri

Masa kenduri kahwin Siti & Datuk K dulu, ada la terbaca 'komen2' tentang belanja kenduri tersebut. Ada yang mengatakan belanjanya besar sangat. Membazir. Lebih elok disedekahkan kat anak2 yatim. 

Kata orang, ukur baju di badan sendiri. Dalam hal ini, ukur belanja kenduri di akaun bank sendiri. Rasanya, akaun bank Datuk K dan Siti cukup besar untuk menampung belanja kenduri mereka. Tak perlu nak berhutang piutang. Mereka memang mampu. Nak komen apa?

Yang patut kena komen ialah orang kebanyakan yg berbelanja di luar kemampuan. Bajet keseluruhan memanglah sangat kecil kalau dibandingkan dengan belanja kenduri Siti. Tapi, bagi yang bergaji rendah - emphasis on 'bergaji - perlu ke nak berbelanja beribu2 untuk kenduri kahwin? Dalam banyak kes, nyata akaun bank tak cukup besar untuk menampung belanja kenduri. Kena cover dengan pinjaman. Makin sempitlah akaun bank. Makin compang camping. Macam orang berbaju tak cukup kain.

Tentang agihan duit untuk kenduri itu, tuan empunya akaun bank yang lebih tahu. Dah berapa banyak zakat yang ditunai, sedekah yang diberi, masjid yang didiri, infaq kanan kiri. Siapa kita nak mengajar Datuk K cara2 berbelanja? Adakah rekod kewangan kita lebih cemerlang dari dia. Nak komen apa? 

Sebenarnya, adalah lebih baik Datuk K dan Siti buat majlis ringkas, dah belanja yang dijimatkan tu, disedekahkan kepada peng'komen'2 tu, kan? Baru puas hati.

Gambar salji

Monday, February 09, 2009


Nak kata marah, tak tau nak marah apa dan siapa. Tapi, geram tu memang la ada. Meronyam2 je rasanya. 

Mike yang pertama,
Sebelum Tuanku bukak mulut, mike kata mike yakin dengan kebijaksanaan Tuanku dalam membuat keputusan. Maknanya, bubar atau tak bubar, mike nak akur dengan apa yang Tuanku putuskan. Bila Tuanku dah bukak mulut, mike mohon derhaka la pulak? Penyokong2 mike pulak nak 'perang' habis2an kat negeri teman. Biar bebenor yop. Jangan buat tak tentu pasé. Karang tumpor macam katak tengah jalan - sia-sia je.

Mike yang bertiga,
Kome bertiga ni, apa ke hé nya? Ngikut perangai binatang dua alam pulak. Kome ni memang jenis dua alam ke? Atau hati tu yang dua alam? Ada ingat alam akhirat dak?

Mike-mike yang tersengih,
Bangga bebenor ke kome? Sengih sana sini. Dah dapat balik kerusi negeri, ingat mike hebat bebenor ke apa? Mike bukan menang besor pun. Rasanya, sama banyak je yg suka dengan yg tak suka kat mike. Mike dah yakin bebenor Allah suka kat mike? Tangan kome dah cukup bersih ke nak megang benda yg kome rebutkan tu? Rasuah mughalazah dah samak ke?

Kome jangan ingat rakyat tak de dolat. Jangan lupa, nak memerintah bior berkat. Kalo benda yg kome buat tu Allah tak redha, tak de nya kome nak dapat berkat; jauh panggang dari api. ntah2, kome pulak yg makin dekat dengan api neraka. Ingat tu.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

11 Safar

Yesterday was my birthday, according to the Hijrah calendar. So, I'm 35 years old already.

The present that I got for myself was submitting an article to the journal Cognition, Techonology and Work. That's one journal, not three. I used the online submission. It was a bit tedious, but I expect it would hasten the processing of manuscripts. Hopefully, by around this time next year, I will the a (follow up) present of my article being published. Amin.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

SAD Snow

Pagi ni snow turun lagi. Sama lebat dgn hari Isnin lepas. 

Rasa sedih. 

Sengaja aku pilih UK, dan bukannya Kanada atau USA. Demi nak mengelak salji. Tapi berselimut salji juga rupanya.

Sejuknya sampai ke tangkai hati. Kuntum2 crocus tertimbus. Musim bunga yang diharap tiba, tidak bingkas. Harapan bersiram suam photon tertimbus di sisi crocus.

Pagi ini, aku diserang SAD (seasonal affective disorder).

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Sembang-sembang Berisi: Life-Coaching

On Tuesday (3 Feb), I was invited by MML (Masyarakat Melayu-Malaysia Loughborough) to facilitate a session. Someone mentioned a possible contribution by me as someone who has a psychology background. I suggested life-coaching as a topic, and it was quickly acted upon. So, on Friday, at the University's library, I handled a sharing session on life-coaching.

The turnout was just right, bearing in mind that there were only 6 people in the Life Coaching workshop that I attended before. The number of attendees was right to handle the session.

In retrospect, I was more 'lecturing' than 'facilitating'. With the time constraints, I managed to go through all my to-discuss items. The only thing missing was the practical part. There was a request for a follow up session. So, perhaps, the practice can be done next week.

Movie: Alive

I want to watch a movie 
that makes me feel happy 
to be alive
to be

Happy that I'm breathing
and spreading my field of vision
across a sea of humanity
and the inhumanity of it all 

Happy that I still stand 
regardless of height and stature
wanting nothing more
than being a part of nature

I want to watch a movie
that makes me happy
being in this tapestry
that we call life

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

White February

Last year, during this month, the weather was quite nice. There was a week with a spring-like temperature. The jacket was not required for going outdoor. However, the beginning of February this year was accompanied by a rather heavy snowfall. In fact, among the heaviest in the last 20 years or so. Some people, including the mat salleh, were overly excited by this natural phenomena. In front of the university library, around 20 students ambushed passer bys - pedestarians and vehicles alike - with snow balls. One girl was hit squarely on her head. A library staff tried to shoo them away. A security personnel was involved as well. But, perhaps the students' brain cells were frozen - they did not care that some people may feel that what they did was abusive, juvenile, and offensive.

In December and January, there were times when we had frozen precipitations. However, they are more flurries than snow. On Monday, I saw real snow. It snowed 'properly' in Loughborough. I mean, I saw some beautiful snowflakes, not just misshapen frozen droplets. They brought back the memories from when I was in Canada. So much snow for many months.

Walking on a fresh blanket of snow is a lot of fun, if don't mind the biting cold temperature. So white, and pure. I revel in the way my feet sink into the soft cottony surface. Of course, if the snow is deep, walking can be awfully slow. On a vast sloping field, one can enjoy rolling downhill on a toboggan or sled. Or, if your body can take it, you can simply roll down silly.

Sometimes, changes in the temperature make the snow 'crunchy'.  Your feet makes crunching sounds when walking on a mixed layer of snow and ice. Sort of makes you feel okay walking out and being chilled. Jumping up and down can intensify the sound. Not to be encouraged, though. Especially when there are more ice than snow. It would be dangerous. Falling down on your bum is a real risk that you take when walking outside.

But then, when gritting materials are mixed with snow to reduce slipperiness, the snow becomes impure. Wet. And dirty. And that's not fun. Till next time then.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

February Song

I begin February posting with this song from Josh Groban. I will come back to you one day.

February Song - Josh Groban

Where has that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won't be long
Til he opens his eyes, opens his eyes
Where is that simple day
Before colors broke into shades
And how did I ever fade
Into this life, into this life

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you one day

Morning is waking up
And sometimes it's more than just enough
When all that you need to love
Is in front of your eyes
It's in front of your eyes

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
Sometimes it's hard to find the ground
Cause I keep on falling as I try to get away
From this crazy world

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you one day

Where has that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won't be long
Til he opens his eyes
Opens his eyes