Monday, August 22, 2005

Spending the weekend at Kuala Perlis

Dari Gombak ke Kuala Perlis
Bila sampai hujanpun reda
Masuk duduk di dalam majlis
Berkongsi ilmu mencambah minda

Pulau di tengah berbalam-balam
Terlalu jauh tak tercapai tangan
Melihat laut di waktu malam
Terkenang pada dia dan kenangan

Mendung berarak melindung bulan
Di tepi laut suram cahayanya
Telah kuberi ceritaku tuan
Mudah-mudahan ada gunanya

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

A Bad Day

When bad things happen, they happen in clusters. An instructive example was things that happened yesterday (Tuesday).

I was merrily (you can dispute that adverb) teaching, swaying back on forth between the table and the wall. As is my habit, I also moved sideways. On this particular morning, my swaying movement landed me in an embarrasing situation.

To understand the embarrassment, you need to know that on the wall is a whiteboard. And attached at the bottom of the board is a slate of metal for holding the marker pens and duster. You see, the edge of the slate is quite sharp. And its sharpness was empathetically demonstrated when I rubbed - unintentionally, of course - my behind against the edge. The sound of a tearing cloth rang loudly in my ears. My hand quickly found its way to assess (no pun intended) the severity of the situation. About an inch of vertical gap had appeared in my pants. What can I do? I excused myself, walked out like a crab (sideways, and with as much grace), and get myself a change of outfit. End of bad day scene number one.

When I got home later that evening, I tossed my sweat-drenched t-shirt in the pail. (You see, I had returned from an exciting badminton game. I played for about two hours: my stamina was ok, but my skill, again, is comparable to that of a crab). I intended to soak it (the shirt, not the crab) for a while before washing it with other articles of clothings. Imagine the frustation when I discovered the tap had run dry! (Now I know that my apartment does not have a water tank.) Somehow, I got an instinct to check the water meter outside. To add horror to the frustration, I saw the meter locked. The padlock was bright and shiny and it taunting me as if I was a helpless crab being dangled by a rope (I hope you get the crabby theme by now).

So, with a body reeking of sweat, I had to seek a place to perform ablution, and Maghrib prayer. And to take a shower. Later, i discovered that the previous tenant had not paid maintenence fee and water bill that amounted to RM369.51. No wonder the apartment management was crabby.

Quite an event, wasn't it. But, as my friend mentioned to me, through his SMS (Positive thinking is like this: You see a small bird flying, you look up, and it shits in your eyes. You don't cry, nor you get angry. Instead, you thank God, because cows don't fly). Oooppss... I shouldn't have put a period after the bracket, but i suspect you don't have long enough breath to take the previous incomplete sentence, plus what's suppose to come after it, in one go. So, I am sparing you the misery by violating the grammer. Fair enough? (breath in....out.....in.....out....)

Err.....where was I? Yeah. I was about to make a point about positive thinking. Yes, indeed I thank God that cows don't fly. But flightless cow are of no use to me, unless they can dryclean my shirt. So, more appropriately for my situation, I was thankful that I did have spare clothings in my car. And I did have a place where the water meter was not locked. I should not blame anyone, really. Afterall, this crab had managed to take a shower!

Learning from the son

This entry will hopefully be a reminder of what I felt last weekend. I hope this memory stays with me for a long time. And if need be, people can refer to this entry to know how I felt on Sunday, 14 August 2005.

I was towelling Marwan dry. And being the cheerful kid that he is, he used his hands to land punches on my body. Some of the punches were aimed at my head. Now, I have mentioned to him, in previous occassions, that this behavior is not acceptable. On this particular instance, may be my voice was firmer than usual. Then I saw him retreating from me, and his tears began to run down his cheek.

Not being able to put my own emotion under control, my tears found their way down my cheek. The sadness of ending the weekend with him was multiplied by the tears that I saw. And he made a valiant effort of sulking at my admonishment. He refused to let me dress him up. I relented after a few trials of facilitating him. When he was trying to put on his belt, he struggled. By then his cry has been reduced to sobs. I tried to approach him again, and he let me help him with the belt. End of part one.

We performed the 'asr prayer together. And he stayed with me till the end. After we shook hand, I gave him a big hug. And he hug me back. Tightly. And then I heard him sobbing. I ran my hand on his back, consoling him with forgiveness. And an explanation that I was not angry with him. I had only intended for him to stop hitting my head. In between his tears and mine, we found new strength and depth in our relationship. I hope he really know I love him no matter what. And I know I can correct his behavior and he will not hate me for doing so.

Ayah loves you so much Marwan.